Monthly Archives: October 2007

Choosing a Divorce Attorney – Flexibility is Key

Posted in Alternate Roads in Family Law, Attorney Client Relationship, Family Law Basics | |

I recently fielded a phone call from a business colleague who told me that she had referred me to a friend for matrimonial work. She mentioned that when she was getting a divorce she found that her attorney became too adversarial and impeded the progress of the divorce. She told me that, from her perspective, the divorce attorneys were making it about themselves and not about the clients.

I cringe when I hear that kind of story. One of the hallmarks of our practice is that the client and his/her needs are at the forefront of our minds when dealing with the case. I’ve often told many clients in an initial interview that I have no ego in the case. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve swallowed insult after insinuation about me and my firm because retaliation would have been counterproductive. This type of pliability in a negotiation is necessary because the goal is more important than maintaining ground in the ego game.

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NEW SERIES: Alternative Dispute Resolution Options for Divorce in New Jersey

Posted in Alternate Roads in Family Law, Family Law Basics, Mediation and Collaboration in Family Law | |

If you ask most people what they think about divorce, it’s a safe bet the responses you get will not be positive. And if you ask most people to describe the typical divorce process, you will most likely get descriptions involving warring spouses, costly legal fees and overzealous attorneys battling it out before a judge in a court of law. The reality is that most divorce cases, especially in New Jersey are settled at some point and rarely end up going to trial.

Though divorce litigation can be expensive, there are cost-effective alternatives available to parties that often result in settlement as opposed to trial. The most common alternatives to trial involve Early Settlement Panels (ESP), mediation or arbitration.

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Passport Denial Program & Back Child Support

Posted in Child Custody & Visitation, Child Support, Father's Rights in Family Law | |

A few reputable blogs (here and here) have recently posted on the State Department’s Passport Denial Program.

In short, the State Department denies passports to non-custodial parents who owe more than $2,500 in back child support. Once the non-custodial parent is no longer in arrears, he or she may reapply for a passport.

With the new western hemisphere initiative, requiring a passport for travel to Canada, Mexico and the Caribbean (not Puerto Rico, though), money obtained through the Passport Denial Program is set to double versus last year.

Suze Orman on Prenuptial Agreements

Posted in Attorney Client Relationship, Family Law Basics, Marriage & Family | |

A local New Jersey newspaper recently published a great article from Suze Orman on the advisability of pre-nuptial agreement.

Here’s the article:

Should marrying types have prenup? Yup

I know what you’re thinking: Prenups are so unromantic — a sign of distrust, not love. Time for a reality check, my friends. First, drawing up a prenuptial agreement together is a sign of incredible trust and financial openness — you’re fooling yourself if you think you can achieve complete in timacy without it. And at the risk of being a complete wet blanket, I just want to mention that north of 40 percent of marriages end up in divorce.

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A Good Perspective on Settlement Versus Trial

Posted in Alternate Roads in Family Law, Divorce & Seperation, Mediation and Collaboration in Family Law | |

This recent post (reprinted below) at the Minnesota Divorce & Family Law weblog run by Gerald Williams illustrates a point that most family lawyers understand well. There needs to be a fundamental meeting of the minds for two parties to agree on a settlement. If not, settling those fundamental issues and getting the two divorcing parties to have that meeting of the minds is best left to a third-party, uh, “decider.” This doesn’t mean that you can’t go back to negotiation a settlement on those terms, but you won’t get over that hump until

Given that it’s the playoffs, let’s use baseball as an analogy – if you can’t agree that you’re going to play baseball, it doesn’t matter whether you use aluminum or wooden bats, who bats first, or who gets to wear the home colors.

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Selling Everything That’s Not Nailed Down

Posted in Assets and Debts, Divorce & Seperation, Property & Asset Distribution | |

Those of you familiar with the NFL and the New York Giants will recognize Michael Strahan. You may have also heard about the nasty divorce proceeding he’s going through with his wife. I have no feelings on this divorce one way or the other, but this post from Charles Abut’s New Jersey Family Law Blog highlights some of the things going on in that case. Specifically, Strahan is arguing that everything be sold at auction. Here’s a snippet:

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Electronic Evidence – A Cautionary Tale

Posted in Divorce & Seperation, Family Law Basics, Marriage & Family | |

Our firm has long been using electronic evidence as means to get a full financial picture or to help determine the fitness of a parent to retain custody or visitation privileges.

This article from the New York Times highlights how this electronic evidence is being used by spouses. (Registration required to view the article.)

Typically, if one spouse is considering gathering electronic evidence against another spouse, things are bad and there is some reason why they think they’ll find something. While we counsel our clients not to get involved in snooping for snooping’s sake, we still believe that there is some value in gathering electronic evidence for the right reasons.

Can Your Ex Move Your Children Out of New Jersey?

Posted in Child Custody & Visitation, Family Law Basics, Father's Rights in Family Law | |

This recent post on the Missouri Divorce & Family Law Blog on removal of minor children out of state prompted me to post on the same subject as it relates to New Jersey law.

As it always the case regarding minor children, the courts are concerned with the best interests of the child. The New Jersey statute governing removal of minor children, specifically N.J.S.A. 9:2-2, is there to preserve the rights of the non-custodial parent and his/her child to develop and maintain their familial relationship. Absent a consensual agreement between the parents, the relocating spouse must obtain a court order to permit the move.

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